Flashback: Counting The Days

It ain't over till it’s over.

I fixed my things yesternight, confused of what to bring and what not to bring. Finally, I’m leaving – two days from now, that is. I said to myself, when it’s time to cry, it’ll be all for crying. So I had a good cry. That was what I needed. I wished it didn't rain yesterday. Somehow the rain spoiled half of my day. I could have done a lot more.  But just as I cannot stop myself from leaving, I cannot stop the rain from falling.

I decided to leave some valuables at home – not because they’re just extra luggage, not because they’re not important anymore, not because I want to get rid of the memories, but because I knew that at one point  in life, some things need to be left behind just so we could move forward and that doesn't mean moving away. Maybe that’s why they say, the more things change, the more they remain the same.

I’m excited as much as I’m sad.  But I hope things will turn out fine. So that when it’s time to smile, it’ll be all for smiling.

FIVE years ago on this same date, May 19, I wrote the above post back on my Wordpress college blog. I miss that blog. There's a reason why I called it Nostalgia. I wrote about how I felt the excitement and pain of leaving my hometown and my university to move to a new city to work. Oh the distance.

I thought, I was just an hour or so away by plane, no need to worry. Days passed and that hour or so away felt like so many miles away. When I moved, I also started a new blog which I called REAlity Bites to document my new life as Little Ms. Independent. I was just 20.

FIVE years ago, I applied in about 3 companies during our university's job fair. A few weeks after, I was invited to take one of the company's exams and interviews. I took a series of tests and some interviews. There were 9 of us applying and at the end of the day, I was the only one accepted. They said they would just call me so I wasn't sure if I was going to pursue the job.

And I said wow, is this survival of the fittest? And I was hired in just one day? It was an entry-level position which I didn't know would bring me to my current position as a Lead Trainer. Nevertheless, I congratulated myself for being hired even before I even graduated college. Our graduation would be a month after I was hired.

FIVE years ago, as I was waiting for our graduation, the company invited me for a job offer. I was in school processing my exit clearance and the call was a bit choppy. All I knew was that they're asking me to go to their office. I heard the word offer but I didn't understand it. When I got to their office, I saw papers and employment contracts and I didn't realize they were already asking me to sign! I was such a youngster! I asked them for some minutes so I could call my mom. Back then, I would always ask my parents about all my decisions. 

Before the job offer, I already told my mom that I was going to back out because my friends weren't joining me and I was a bit scared of moving without any friends with me in a new place. Then my mom said, just because they're going to back out doesn't mean you have to back out too. So in just 5 minutes, I took the offer that would relocate me to a new city in one month's time and happy that I was provided with Php20,000 or around $500 relocation package along with 3 days/2 nights stay in a hotel. It had a promising compensation especially to a newbie like me. 

FIVE years ago, I took on the challenge of leaving home again. I told myself that I could do it. I've spent college away from home so why couldn't I spend working away from home too? But honestly, I was just too scared to leave my comfort zone. My parents would be far away and I wouldn't be able to run to them when I needed to! I would be away from my best friends and when something goes wrong, I wouldn't have the time to see them face to face. I was scared but I was strong enough to accept the challenge.

FIVE years ago, I accepted the challenge. And now I'm glad I did. So in those 5 years, I've grown pretty fast. I had a husband and a kid. I still have the same job and as much as I love to move back to my hometown, I also can't imagine what it's like to leave this city where I grew up to be more independent.

I did not plan my life at all. Things happened because I brought myself there. It's been a bumpy ride. There were bad times but mostly there were good times. 

FIVE years ago seemed like five centuries! And you would probably tell me, it was just 5 years ago. True enough. But FIVE years ago, I didn't imagine that THIS would be LIFE. And I know I wouldn't want it any other way. I'm just thankful... for those FIVE years. 

And this is where my happy song goes. WE ARE YOUNG by FUN.

Was there a point in your life where you had to move out of your comfort zone? How did you feel about it and was it worth it? I'd love to know! 

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